Where Am I Driving To?

The Moon
The moonlight from my home. So beautiful, and yet, so unreachable.

Let me tell you why I love to drive. It’s so much more than the sing-along of your favourite songs from the radio; deeper than the fact that you are in complete control of your vehicle. The single blessed thing is that you know perfectly where you’re headed. Forget the beating of bushes or unnecessary round-abouts, for you know the destination and that will always remain steadfast.

It’s unbelievably duplicitous. 4 years of longing and 2 years of enduring; 3 months before flying away to the other end of the world I start to chase this pipe dream – this dream of happiness. Maybe it’s my naivete that led me to these delusions of being finally saved and loved.

I guess I’ll always be naive, blindly believing that someone will finally come and stay for good, up until when it’s time for me to get hurt. It’s like always getting cheated by the same con because on every occasion he will promise that his word is true, and I foolishly accept.

I’m an inevitable failure in progress, unloved, and unsaveable.

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