The downfall continues: I got conned out of US$20+ dollars in Chicago (which I am not going into). . . and I just got rejected for a staff writer position for the Michigan Independent. I don’t know what’s wrong with this semester; I’m just fecking pathetic, always aiming and never reaching. It’s really no wonder why I’m not wanted by her – because I keep failing.
Some kind of writer I am; 21 years old and still nothing to show for it. Some fifteen-year-old is probably a world bestseller right now. Times like this, I can only look to my God. Even though the situation doesn’t magically and miraculously alter into some ideal image in my mind, it just gives me an avenue to let all the pain, hurt and tears out.
But honestly sometimes I wish someone would just put a gun to my heart, say “this is your solution”, and pull the trigger.